wandering around aimlessly...

i am not a fan of meandering. if i'm out and about, i usually know where i'm going, why i'm going there, when i'll get there, and what i'll do when i get there. recently i have learned this is not how everyone lives life. some people are just happy to be out and about. i think they enjoy the journey maybe even more than the destination. the competitive, 2nd of five boys, never say die part of me thinks they are crazy, but i am learning to love them and maybe even learning to appreciate their perspective. recently, i have found myself in the midst of a major transition in life. i don't have a job that defines me and my day to day activities. i have no real deadlines that challenge me to produce something and therefore allow me to calculate and assess my worth. and nobody is really telling me "great job micah..." because the work i'm involved in is with my brother sanding floors that people will eventually walk on.

what if there is something for me to learn in this stretch of time? what if i am not the sum of my accomplishments and "jobs well done" and am loved just because i'm me? what if i can learn to trust, and wait on God in times of uncertainty and doubt? what if i can learn to just be still and know that there is a God out there who loves me and wants what is best for me? what if the journey really is something beautiful in and of itself? i wonder what will happen when "i get there?" i'll probably wish i could go back and enjoy the simple things in life like my daughter running through the sprinkler or splashing in the bath tub. or the sound of my wife's voice on the other end of the phone..."hey it's me."

maybe i'll just meander here a bit longer and to see what i can see.